When someone is stuck on telling YOU about YOU, please don’t take it personal. Why? 9 times out of 10, they are projecting how they feel about themselves onto everyone else. And, they may not even realize it.
If you happen to BE one of these people, let’s be clear…. if you know better, I believe you should DO better. Do everything you can to STOP projecting your own fears (aka. Insecurities) onto the world.
We’ve all got “our stuff”, but kudos to those that are willing to admit that they are a work in progress AND actually make it a point to WORK on progressing.
3 ways to stop projecting your insecurities onto the world
- Check your INTERNAL dialog. Is YOUR inner critic holding you hostage? Are you in a constant struggle with STOPPING your own negative self-talk? That is probably the case if you find yourself spewing negativity everywhere you go OR finding fault with EVERYONE, but are never accountable for your own actions. Without checking your internal dialog and getting clear that you might genuinely be angry about “other things” hence being angry with everyone you come in contact with, you can’t stop projecting your own insecurities onto the world. Everything starts from WITHIN. Insecurity grows if you don’t get to the ROOT. As my wife always says, “your root does NOT have to be your result.”
- Stop making a joke about everything. You’ve heard the saying, “there’s always some truth behind a joke” – insecure people try to “laugh everything off” because it means you don’t have to actually deal with YOUR STUFF. Let’s get real today. Stop laughing and start addressing what is really going on. When you haven’t dealt with your OWN stuff, you will always make IT about other people. You will inevitably play the blame game. And, no one wins in that game. Insecurities are blanketed with low key insults or “jokes” about other people. Get serious about the fact that it’s only a matter of time before someone calls you out on projecting all of YOUR stuff onto them and that may not end well. Stop joking and start healing!
- Celebrate other people’s success. Insecure people find it really hard to celebrate the success of anyone else. If you don’t think you could be as successful as someone else, your first instinct is to berate them or make sure whomever is in earshot KNOWS that it was a stroke of luck and not based on anything else. If you actually CELEBRATED the success of others, you can finally stop being a “mean girl” and that, my friend is liberating. Don’t be afraid to be HAPPY for a fellow human being. Insecurity breeds fear and it could likely be fear of failing and if you’re afraid of failing, it would be difficult to celebrate anyone else. Recognize that! Whenever possible, CELEBRATE those around you. Shower people with compliments CONSCIOUSLY and DELIBERATELY. It’s life changing!
The point remains that yes, we all have work to do….on ourselves. If you are insecure and it constantly comes out in how you talk to people or treat people, don’t just gloss over it. Do something about it! Start with the 3 easy tips above. It’s a start, but shouldn’t stop there. Smile more too! Be kind. Realize that whatever you put out into the world boomerangs back to you.
